Financial stability is often a challenging goal, especially when external factors such as family dynamics come into play this happens mainly in Africa. Although family support can be a crucial pillar for success, there are some cases when the opposite occurs.
NOTE: We are not against supporting your African family because you were once supported by it in any way, our explanation is based on family heavy reliance.
African Families can sometimes unintentionally or even deliberately hinder your financial breakthrough. Below are 10 ways this can happen, backed by statistics and real-life examples.
1. Dependency Syndrome
The “dependency syndrome” refers to family members continuously and heavily relying on a successful member for financial support, often to their detriment. This scenario is common in African families, in Zambia we do call them ‘bread winners’ where extended family obligations weigh heavily on the financially stable – few individuals especially those in urban areas.
A 2022 survey by The Guardian in Kenya reported that 65% of young professionals cite family obligations as one of the biggest financial burdens they face. For example, James, a 35-year-old engineer, found himself financially exhausted after continuously supporting his unemployed siblings and extended relatives. His business venture, which needed capital to grow, eventually failed because of a lack of funds, a direct result of his family’s dependence on him.
We have witnessed an example stated above many Zambian families. Avoiding this situation is not an easy task because once you attempt to avoid it you will be labelled as a stingy and rude person.
2. Jealousy
Success can sometimes breed jealousy within families. When one member achieves financial independence, others may feel left behind, fostering resentment. In extreme cases, this can lead to sabotage and it motivates witchcraft. Mostly jealousy comes from the children born out of the wedlock.
A study from The American Journal of Family Therapy found that 33% of families experience tension due to income disparities among siblings. For example, Maria, an entrepreneur from South Africa, faced backlash from her relatives after launching a successful business. Instead of celebrating her success, some family members started spreading rumours that she obtained her wealth through unethical means.
3. Negativity
Constant criticism or a lack of belief in your dreams can stifle progress. Family members who are overly critical or pessimistic about your financial goals may unintentionally discourage you from taking the risks necessary for success.
For instance, Tomas, a software developer in Zambia, wanted to invest in a tech startup. His family, however, convinced him that it was too risky and that he would lose his savings. After abandoning the idea, Tomas watched as others who invested in similar startups prospered. The fear of failure, largely instilled by his family’s negativity, held him back from a significant financial opportunity. That’s how he quitted.
4. Pressure to Maintain a Lavish Lifestyle
When one family member becomes financially successful, there’s often pressure to appear wealthy, even when the funds should be allocated toward savings or investments. Family gatherings, holidays, and community events may become more extravagant, with the successful member footing most of the bills.
In Nigeria, a 2020 report by BBC Africa showed that many young professionals feel pressured to “live large” to maintain status in their communities. This was the case for Ade, who was constantly asked to sponsor family weddings and funerals. Over time, these lavish expenses drained his savings, delaying his plans to purchase a home and invest more.
5. Entitlement Mentality
Family members may feel entitled to your success, assuming they have a claim to your earnings simply because of their relationship with you. This entitlement can manifest as frequent financial requests, creating strain on your finances.
Rachel, a nurse in Zimbabwe. After moving abroad and securing a high-paying job, she found herself constantly sending money back home. Her siblings began relying on her as their primary source of income, leaving her little room to invest in her future or retirement.
In Africa, it is known that whenever someone is working from abroad the money is not a problem to him or her, hence, resisting sending money back home is a great challenge.
6. Sabotaging Investments
In some cases, family members may actively interfere with your financial plans, especially when they don’t align with their vision of success. Whether it’s convincing you to make poor investments or discouraging you from pursuing profitable ventures, family influence can be detrimental.
John from Copperbelt province of Zambia, an entrepreneur, was persuaded by his uncle to invest in a failing family business instead of continuing with his profitable retail venture. The family business eventually collapsed, causing John significant financial loss. In fact less attention is given to family businesses because the hardship of gaining the capital is only known by few members of the family.
7. Emotional Blackmail
Family members may use guilt or emotional manipulation to divert your funds toward their personal needs. This often comes at the expense of your financial goals, leaving you stuck in a cycle of giving that hinders your personal growth.
A survey by The Financial Planning Association found that 22% of individuals feel pressured by family members to offer financial assistance. Lisa, a single mother, had saved up for her children’s education but was guilted by her mother into using the money to pay for her brother’s medical bills. This set Lisa’s financial plans back significantly. Families are dangerous because in most cases I have witnessed that the reasons for asking for money are ever seem genuine.
8. Inheritance Expectations
Some family members may hold off on building their own wealth, assuming they will inherit yours. This assumption can create tension and unrealistic expectations that pressure the wealthier family member to continue accumulating wealth for others rather than focusing on personal goals.
Mike, a successful businessman of central province in Zambia, found that his siblings stopped striving for financial independence, waiting for him to pass down his business. This sense of entitlement created a rift within the family, and Mike eventually had to confront them, explaining that they needed to build their own financial security.
In some situations inheritance expectations may cause family felonies like murder. Avoid a tendency of trusting every member of your family including your own wife(ves).
9. Borrowing Without Repayment
Lending money to family members without any structure or expectation of repayment can quickly become a financial trap. When family members borrow money but fail to repay it, the lender (you) ends up shouldering the financial burden.
In 2019, a Forbes article discussed how informal loans between family members often lead to strained relationships. Sarah, a small business owner, had to close her bakery after her brother failed to repay a large loan she had given him to start his own business. The loss of those funds crippled her ability to keep her business afloat.
And do you know what they do? They will give you a surety that the money will be paid back no matter what. According to my experience the chance of recovering the money you lent to your sibling or a guardian is extremely very low.
I don’t know if it is everywhere but in Africa it is our culture that you cannot take a legal action when you differ with your family member over an issue involving credits!
10. Lack of Boundaries
Without clear boundaries, family members may overstep their financial requests, assuming you’re always available to solve their money problems. A lack of boundaries often leads to exhaustion, both emotionally and financially.
Setting boundaries was difficult for Martha, a teacher in Zambia, whose family constantly approached her for financial help. It wasn’t until she nearly went bankrupt that she realised the importance of saying “no” and establishing limits on how much she was willing to give.
We have complex extended family members in Africa, these people will only know you when you are successful. In case something messes up on you financially you will never see anyone.
Conclusion
While family is often a source of love and support, it’s essential to recognize the ways in which family dynamics can negatively impact your financial breakthrough. Setting boundaries, making independent financial decisions, and resisting unhealthy dependence or emotional manipulation are crucial steps to safeguarding your financial future. By learning from these examples and implementing strategies to mitigate these risks, you can maintain control over your financial destiny.
Remember that no matter the amount of help you render, you will never finish African family problems; they will just be flowing like water from a well trusted stream which never dries up!
